Member-only story
What keeps you from speaking, writing, singing?
My heart gets choked with fear and wraps those tendrils around my vocal cords
“Don’t let anyone see me”
“They’ll never accept me or love me as I am”
“Don’t you DARE let them know the truth”
Sometimes the tendrils feel like a dull knife, trying to sever the parts of me that threaten to expose her.
All I can do is scream.
Eventually, the words come.
Usually, some form of “I hate you”
Aimed at anyone who has ever left a bleeding wound in my heart. At anyone who comes into my flashbacks. At everyone who denied the pain they caused.
“Don’t let them know this still affects us. Don’t let them see that we’re weak”
I adjust my crown.
I am not weak.
The nightmares come and I cannot stop them, but I can fight them.
With love.
With compassion.
With wisdom.
I can allow them to be seen and felt.
Experienced as they should have been the day they happened.
