I need to get this out of my head and onto paper. I’m tired of reliving the memories that I never want to forget. So, this is where I will keep it. The memories of that night. The night my life would unexpectedly change forever.
I pulled into my ex-husband’s driveway at 7:00am.
I was letting my kids stop by to change clothes before school.
The night before we had stayed with a friend and had left in a hurry. My husband had relapsed and from my perspective had suffered some kind of psychotic break. Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it was the depression, maybe it was the stress and pressure of the consequences we were paying for his addiction. I am 99% sure there was also guilt that he couldn’t control the MONSTER. That night, there was rage, there was violence, there was fear, desperation, and panic.
I have never been more scared of him than I was that night.
I had trained myself to remain stoic when I was scared and he was angry and that night, my training came in handy.
I did not raise my voice that night, not even once. I had been blamed for instigating or antagonizing David in our fights enough that I wanted this night to be different. I wanted to be above reproach. I could hear the accusatory questions ringing in my head, “Did you fight back?”…No. “Did…
