It looks like eating until I look 6 months pregnant only to wake up swollen and uncomfortable and ashamed of my choices.
It looks like spilling water, milk, and coffee on the counter while I’m attempting to have a normal morning and leaving it because I don’t care AT ALL that there is a mess.
It’s spending entirely too much money on art supplies with the intention of using art and creation to channel my energies and heal. Then spreading those supplies over my living room floor and beginning several projects….then getting up and leaving it all behind. Every paper, every brush, every sticker and pen and book. They’re all still lying there.
It’s letting my laundry go sour in the washing machine and leaving the dryer door open even after a few clean pieces fall out and mix with the still dirty laundry strewn across the floor…..and not bothering to figure out which is which and just washing everything again….eventually.
It’s staying in my pajamas even though I CLEARLY need a shower and staring at the wall for 15 mins in between writing each of these sentences.
It’s sleeping for 12 hours and lying in bed until the caffeine headache kicks in and I am forced to move.
It’s binging on Netflix and ice cream because this is the only “chill” I can now manage.
