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I want to remember…Reflections of a Young Widow
I found my husband on the morning of November 18 after he had taken his own life. He struggled with alcoholism and mental illness and I have changed in indescribable ways since that day. Here are some of my reflections…
I want to remember the good times we had without drowning in sorrow.
The gratitude I have for what we lived comes crashing in, a tidal wave of love. The love we would have given one another over another lifetime together. The love of watching our children get married, for our grand babies and a childhood’s worth of memories with Gigi and Pops.
Life is made to be lived, hard and unforgivingly.
“To commit yourself in marriage to someone is to say that the work of loving them is worth the pain of losing them.” Those were always just beautiful words to come across that so accurately described the pain of love, but they are true. I’ve committed that quote to my heart. The work of loving you was absolutely worth the pain of losing you.
I would do it all again in a heartbeat.
Every ounce of longing and desire that we had for one another drips like honey over the wounds of your death. A soothing balm protecting me from the slightest sting of regret.
